In my opinion, triggers aren’t that hard to handle or deal with, especially when one can see that something is working as a trigger. The more we know about what the trigger is, the easier it gets to address and resolve. But sadly what I’ve noticed is that, some people fail to address the issue immediately and the longer it is left unattended, the worse it can get.
It becomes even more crucial to understand this in close relationships.
If you notice that a close one, daughter, mother or your partner is upset about something, the best thing to do, to not make the matters worse for them or yourselves, is to deal with it and resolve it. The longer you keep it or run away from it, the stronger the effects can be and can damage important relationships. Sometimes the damage can be beyond repair.
So, why not deal with things right when it is needed. You may find it very intimidating and it is hard to get out of the comfort zone and apologise sometimes, but when you know you are at fault or that something you have done is causing anxiety in the other person, it is best to not let the matters get worse. Communication is the key and it needs to be done right when the trigger is noticed. Delaying such things can cause panic attack and major episodes, suicidal thoughts, depressive episode and even mania depending on how the situation is tackled.
It is very easy to spend good times with your close ones but what matters is to be there; being there in thick and thin. Most people seem to forget the latter part! Not being there in such times is what can cause even more grief and anxiety. Some people tend to run away from such situations and think they will deal with it later on, at a time that is convenient to them. Well, unfortunately, I don’t think that is the right attitude to fix an issue. Some people find it easy to sleep through things but there are others who can find it extremely difficult. Especially if this close person is suffering from a mental health issue, sleep is very crucial to avoid the hospital, having been to the hospital for similar reasons, I know this very well on how important that sleep can be. Just because you find it easy to not handle the situation right then, doesn’t necessarily mean that the other person wants the same.Sometimes confronting is hard to do and people want to escape from doing so but then to avoid the build up effects of trigger this is the best approach, like it or not! It is important to understand each other what they need. People with mental health issue are not any different from others, it’s just the chemical imbalance they go through. Reminding them that they have a mental health issue each time, instead of actually dealing with what has caused the trigger doesn’t help in anyway.
If the trigger is handled in time, issues get resolved easily, A well managed trigger saves a lot of time and effort which can otherwise be spent in arguments. A well managed trigger can avoid anger altogether. Most people blame the fact that bipolar people can be extremely angry but the fact of the matter is, it takes a lot to get to that anger level. If the trigger is addressed in time, chances are that the trigger becomes ineffective and there would be no need to even face that anger. So if you see something working as a trigger, why not remove the trigger as soon as possible without any time delay.
If you have a partner or a close one that has a mental health issue don’t just remind them of it all the time and stop creating the negativity and stop making them feel that they are any different. A reaction is a reaction and not a bipolar reaction. It’s easy to deflect your faults onto other things and them being bipolar or whatever else, but that’s not the right thing to do. Each time something goes wrong, may not be because they are bipolar, it may very well be that you have done something or said something that’s working as a trigger. Having a stigma and blaming the other person should never be the resort.
The sooner one can look into the trigger and act on it, to either remove it completely or replace it the longer and happier the relationship will be. Life is action and not contemplation, don’t just leave everything on time to heal. This time is very crucial, people have committed suicide and gone into major episodes for not getting things done in time. Understand the importance of time when dealing with. Irony of life is some people leave everything for time to heal, what people forget is that relationship needs efforts, if it was for time to heal everything then wouldn’t everyone be in relationship with time instead?